Boiler and the boiler room

Our boiler is on the blink. The gas people have temporarily done some banging to it to make it work, but we fear it needs a big and major operation to fix it. They will be back with some kind of replacement part (organ donation) to fix it up and help it last a bit longer. Being with hot water is gruesome (hot soft am I?) but it was sort of fun bathing out of a bucket with one third boiling kettle water, two thirds cool cool tap water. Reminded me of being in the village in Sri Lanka and also a bit of my time in Africa. Crucially though, those are hot places so the sting of the cold water isn't so noticeable compared to chilly Swantown. We hope it will be fixed up soon.

With regards to the boiler room, well, my brother has been working in what pretty much seems to be a boiler room (he got made redundant, which some of us are not as devastated about, given the terrible macho atmosphere there) and I have just been listening to a report about "fake boiler rooms" where con artists trick innocent people into spending hundreds and thousands of pounds on non-existent shares. I can't believe how convincing the people sound - it makes me realise that if you have the gift of the gab, you can sell pretty much anything. I only hope my brother wasn't working in a proper boiler room - and that he was actually selling real shares!

In other news it is sunny today, which obviously makes me chirpy. To make the day even better:

1. I have been shopping. This simple act of hunter-gathering (simple so long as you have some money) is wonderfully satisfying, particularly when BARGAINS are to be had. Today bargains included two pairs of TU trousers and also some new potatoes.

2. We have a Weds-date later, to the cinema, whoop! Time Traveller's Wife, no doubt will be terrible as most book-turned-films are, but it'll be fun.

3. England are playing Croatia tonight and we finally have ITV on our telly so we can watch it directly rather than through a dodgy internet connection. Probably the game will be dismal but I am excited for now.

4. Fish and chips with green peas and tartar sauce. Enough said there.

I am pleased for Speech Debelle, who won the Mercury Music Prize last night. I am also a bit gutted that it wasn't Jij who won the prize.. Don't get confused, she wasn't even in the running or anything, but they seem to have had really similar lives and Jij is so talented, I want her to win a prize and make her music too. I will listen to Speech's album later to see what it's like.

Finally, I'm enjoying the holiday having finished A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius - very good, if rambley, but true to life and impressive too - and so now have started Making History by Stephen Fry - the main character is annoying me already - and watching lots of good old telly and listening to Radio 4. Aaah holidays.

Thesis-ing and stuff

Still been working on the thesis. Stata and data work is taking over my life. Not for much longer though - we're away in Scotland this week, hurrah! Going to Edinburgh and Aberdeen, exciting!

Finished Sex and the City series 5, very good, I liked it a lot. Am thinking of watching it backwards now i.e series 4, then series 3 etc.. Also saw Harry Potter 6, which was entertaining. We saw it at the 5:15pm showing, thus it was full of tiny children and their parents (or, given that this is Oxford, more likely nannies). It was funny to watch with them, they were captivated and so excited! Have now been inspired to borrow the books from the library and read them again - they're just so good!

What other news? Now potentially staying in Oxford for my DPhil. Well, certainly not going to Cardiff any more as I've turned down my offer and studentship (yikes!) So we went to see a funny old land lady in Oxford, who has a room to let. It's pretty bargainous I think, but the woman was a proper old Oxford lady so I'm not sure how well we'll get along. Haven't got anywhere else to stay as yet though, so might have to commit there. Hopefully will have paper confirmation of my place and the studentship here soon....

Listening to the cricket while doing some Sri Lankan campaigning. Things are still bad over there. I've been having my head in the sand for a while but it's time to do something useful again. Especially after Friday and yesterday, where most of my time was spent feasting and drinking and having fun - I'm lucky to have all of this so I should try and help others too.

Lots of sports!

A whole weekend of sports, am pretty achey! Played korfball for Wolfson, which was totally awesome - it's kinda like a netball/basketball cross over but boys and girls can play together and the net is huge. It's still hard to throw the ball in though! We came fourth (out of four!) but it was lots of fun. Then we played an epic game of cricket against ChCh, which was really close, but they beat us with just 10 balls to spare. Shame but was nice to hang out in the sun.

Yesterday we completed our group games for 5-aside and finished top of our group. Today we have the quarter-finals (ironically against the team in our group we beat yesterday to come top) and then with a bit of luck a semi-final and a final too. Am excited about that a lot.

There is a giant fat robin eating at our bird-feeder right now, it's totally exciting! Although I just moved to try and get my camera to take a photo, and it flew away. Maybe it'll be back? Oooh I can see him sitting on the fence nearby!

What else? Have learnt that it's much harder to sleep by myself now - I'm very used to having X around. My revision is going ok, still not doing that much work, but a bit now and then. Finished Gang Leader for a Day and also The Namesake (which I've just found out has been made into a film too!), both of which I enjoyed, the first because gangs and ethnographies are very interesting to me, the second because I love stories about second generation Asians and identity. Now reading Outliers, which is very good in terms of concepts, but annoyingly is written in a really popular science style with a very sensationalist use of statistics.

Ok back to work. Fingers crossed for the football!

Thursday 2nd week

Been working on my thesis and revision. Thesis is going ok. Had a meeting with my supervisor on Tuesday (after a lovely long weekend at home) and have some changes to do but think it'll be ok. Ignoring it for now as she recommended spending most of my time revising.

Have two exams (nothing compared to finals!) so trying to figure out which topics to revise etc.

Home was awesome, first BBQ of the year! Saw lots of family and ate really well :) Saw my Granddad too - he's back in the country for six months, woo! He's 89 now and still going strong, which I'm really grateful for. Played poker with the girls and 304 too, good times.

Made plans to go to Washington for a week in August with my Dad and my brother - it's my cousin's wedding. Will be good to see all the family over there as it's been a while.

What else? X is home full-time - woo! Good work ethics will hopefully rub off on me with regards to revision and stuff. Been watching a lot of football. Controversial football for sure. Poor referees in the Champions League - they are making all sorts of mistakes. My brother made a strong case for video referees in the box when I was watching footy with him on the weekend. Now I'm really starting to agree with him. Wrong decisions in the penalty box happen far too regularly. Poor Fletcher will miss the Final for the red card given because of his excellent tackle. Shocking decision and even worse that it can't be appealed against. He behaved really well though - the Chelsea players could learn a thing or too about respect in football from him. That's the other thing, football doesn't have any respect in it, people dive and complain and argue with the ref all the time. Yesterday Ballack was actually chasing and flapping at the ref! There needs to be a system like in rugby where only the captain can talk with the ref and also if people show dissent then decisions should be reversed or they should lose ground on the free kick or something like that. The FA and UEFA and FIFA all those groups need to sort out the refereeing and get some respect back in the game because players and fans are acting like thugs.

Rant over. Saw In The Loop last night, which was great, so funny and actually satirical. Would recommend it for sure. Also click here for Pizza Express vouchers, which are buy one main course get the second free.

Ok I will get back to reading the sequel to The Knife of Never Letting Go. It's called The Ask and The Answer - harrowing stuff, kinda like the situation in Sri Lanka at the moment for the poor oppressed Tamil people caught up in the war zone. I hope this book has a happy ending. I hope in Sri Lanka there's a happy ending too.

1st week

No classes this term! This should be a good thing. And indeed it is. Except it means that all structure to my life has gone. Well, as much as it can go for a semi-serious Virgo like me.

So I have revision for my 9th week exams to do. And I have my thesis to do. And both of them seem due so far away, and both of them are such big tasks (in my head) to even start, that I am failing to do anything properly productive. I know that once I am in the zone of things it'll be sweet, but just getting started is so tedious.

I think it's error working at my desk in the flat. I need to be somewhere where other people are working. That said though, I am loving having this kinda free time. It all feels like I'll get it done someday, so in the meantime I'm just gonna enjoy things.

Finished The Knife of Never Letting Go, which was so awesome. Am very glad that X can get me the sequel before it's released (good stuff those bookshop proofs). We're going to see X-Men Origins:Wolverine tonight, which am pretty psyched about, I love X-Men and Wolverine and Beast are my faves. Sometimes I wonder what I'd like to have as a super power, and I reckon it would still be Prof X's and Jean Grey's ESP-style powers, I mean, they seem really useful in whatever situation.

Was listening to Asher Roth's Asleep in the Bread Aisle - really funny album, would totally recommend it. Now listening to his mixtape The Greenhouse Effect, which I reckon is even better than the full on album! So we will see how the work goes today then.

Am still in weekend mode!

The weekend was so good (we had lots of time for us, plus X's family came up to visit for the first time), and contrary to the weather forecast, Oxford is still full of sun, so I am finding it increasingly difficult to get into work mode. By work, I mean academic, not telethon. That work is going pretty well. Spent the weekend trying to speak with loads of overseas contacts, in places as far flung as Taiwan, Hawaii (didn't actually call them, they are 10 hours behind us!) and West Coast America. Was really interesting speaking with some of the African ones and also ones in Europe. I can't believe the range of activities Old Wolfsonians are up to nowadays, it's awesome!

Have only had a few people who are straight out "hard nos" - people who just won't even consider contributing to the Annual Fund. Most people seem ok to spare at least a few minutes to hear about the college and also let us update their contact details and invite them back to college and that kind of thing. Had a really good session yesterday - I won the wine prize from the day before for writing the best follow-up postcard, and then I also got three pledges, one of which was £100 a year until further notice on direct debit, which earned me an extra bar of Toblerone and a Kinder egg! Bonus!

Only two more evening shifts and then Saturday to go at this job, then I'm done with it. It's been really good though, a lovely bunch of people, plus in theory it should make me focused in the day time (not happened so much in practice this week!). On the plus side though, I have been doing lots of email campaigning directed at our politicians to try and get them to put pressure on the Government of Sri Lanka to stop the genocide and war going on there. It's really terrible out there right now, they have to stop it soon, so many innocent lives are being lost. So I feel at least I am trying to do something, however small, that is useful and maybe will help. I have had a fair few decent replies back from MPs and MEPs so hopefully some big action from our government or an international organisation will happen soon and the suffering can stop.

We are going to London this weekend to watch the boys' varsity football match at Fulham. Craven Cottage is a lovely little stadium, I'm looking forward to it. It's also the boat race in the afternoon, which should be fun. Then on Monday we are planning on going to the London Transport Museum - they have an exhibition of lots of their old posters there, which I really want to see! Then I'm at home for a few days and then going to Cardiff. Why am I going to Cardiff....well, because I got one of their ESRC studentships to do my PhD! Woohoo! It's ace, it means I can study and be fully funded too! I can't believe it really! I'm probably going to take it, but I also have an application in for Oxford, and the one page summary proposal is due this Friday, so that's what I should be getting on with now. Should being the operative word. But classic fm is so relaxing and the room is full of sun, I just want to take my book out and relax!

I finished Call Me By Your Name, which was really good and so intense and accurate at the end, that a little tear drop escaped my eye. Find it if you can. Now reading The Road Home by Rose Tremain, which has had lots of good reviews. Hopefully it won't be too sad, although you know I have a weak spot when it comes to stories of immigrants.

Right, to work with me!

Finally holidays!

Term is done, woo hoo! And I have done the first of my four part qualitative methods project, and nearly the second part too, so things are looking good! We had some nice end of term things with my class, which was great, it's cool to meet everyone's partners and also to spend some non-stress time together, they're a good bunch.

Am shortly off to do my third night of alumni calling on the Wolfson Telethon. The first night was tough, but last night was more optimistic, and I got my first pledge, yeah!

Yesterday was X's birthday so I was busy doing lots of nice things. X liked the presents and we had birthday burritos for lunch and went for drinks in the KA in the evening with some of our old friends, it was a nice birthday. I love seeing our old friends again, they are good people and really make me laugh. X seemed to have had a great day, which makes me happy!

We went to see John Legend in Birmingham on Saturday night, which was totally awesome! This was part of the birthday package :) The Carling Academy is a pretty small venue so we got to see and hear him pretty well. He is really talented, his voice was lovely and he played the piano really well all night too. His backing band were excellent too! I had a great time, and even enjoyed the many trains we had to take from Oxford to London to Birmingham to get there. I'd definitely see him again next time he's here.

I've become a good little housewife I think. Now that classes are done, my days are up to me to manage. Obviously I have my qualitative methods project and also I have to do my ESRC proposal summary for Oxford (which will patently never make the cut, but I guess I should try) and also I have to get cracking on my thesis. But apart from that I have more time to do laundry and clean the kitchen and cook and do the shopping and work on the allotment. All nice things to me, physical work certainly has a good feeling to it sometimes.

I'm reading Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman, and it's ace, I really like it, but it's totally intense. I won't tell you what it's about, but just encourage you to pick it up. You can google it to see the praise.

What else is new? Nothing really, just enjoying the sun and looking forward to having a chilled weekend with my favourite and my best.

Happy New Year!

Once again I'm back! Similar to one of those small shoe factories, I "closed down" over the Christmas break and am now forced to return to work on this first Monday of January. Except I'm not really at work, heehee!

So what's been happening? Some highlights of the vacation (note: I am still on holiday regardless of what my books or the people around me try to tell me)!

1. Christmas day - a true feast of food and presents, so much fun
2. Boxing day football - Fulham vs Spurs, a poor game, but a cool anniversary celebration with X
3. The Nutcracker - nope, not at the Royal Opera House, but instead streamed live at the independent cinema in Notting Hill, very cool and we could take in our own beers and sweets to, aaaah
4. House/cat sitting for D&W and Stripeypants in Shebu - essentially lots of festive fun times with X, brilliant!
5. Our Christmas dinner at Hudsons and stocking swap - the coolest presents and the nicest dinner, we are SO doing that every year
6. Poker party - held at Shebu for my friends to kick off some festive fun, was ace!
7. Knee arthroscopy - this wasn't as much fun, but was def better than when I had the ACL reconstruction and it's healing up quickly too so hopefully my knee will be back to feeling better soon
8. Academic work - so much work, I have done so much work in the break. Ok, fine, I know it seems like I've not really done work but I have, honest. I submitted my last STATA assignment, wrote my Sociological Analysis essay, wrote my Research Design essay (all day Saturday just gone, but I had to do like 3 days of reading before that), two PhD proposals (yes, they are the same basic proposal, but that took ages, like 4 days of solid work). And now I have to refine my proposal and revise some statistics for my exam next week.
9. Chilling out with the family - our house is busy and noisy again and you know my folks are very sociable so we've been busy but having a cool time with just us (and my aunt, uncle and cousin from Canada)
10. Reading and watching films and Christmas telly! - we don't have Sky or cable or any actual TV at the moment so I've finally been able to do some leisure reading again, which is ace. I read The Carbon Diaries (Saci Lloyd) which was really thought-provoking and so I'm trying to be better with my carbon usage. So far this is going well since I'm essentially house-bound. I also read Henry Tumour (Anthony McGowan) which was funny and emotional and for kids so I liked it (as was Carbon Diaries). Now I'm reading A Thousand Splendid Suns (Khaled Hosseini) which X derides because it's populist, but I don't care, it's a good story! Have also been watching things on BBC and ITV online players, which is brilliant!

So yes, that's what I've been doing. My new year's resolutions are similar to last year, including doing something nice for someone each day, not using God as a cuss word, not drinking in January. I'm also going to try and make a plan for my life, and I've been doing some research into that today, so we will see if I can actually go through with it this time! Finally I will try and update my blog more regularly. YES!

School and Sun and Books

School was school, and it was ok. We did some work on religion and prejudice in PSHE - again my kids surprised me with their deep and insightful comments. I can't believe how perceptive some of them are, or even how well they can justify their opinions. They were stars - if only they could be that way all the time. The rest of the day was pretty much normal, and then the Year 8 incentives (good behaviour) club session in afternoon tutor time ran again, and I took sports again, and it was out in the sun and all the kids were running around, and it was just lovely to be a teacher right there and then. Obviously taking the Y7 girls' football club after school kept the high going.

That said, our school is a greenhouse at the moment. The company that installed the ventilation has apparently gone bust, and so the bits that are broken can't be fixed yet. Given the massive glass roof and the number of rooms without external windows, well, parts of the school are unbearable. AND it's only May. Luckily I have windows that don't get too much sun, and I can prop open my classroom door to get a breeze going. Still though, it's going to be a long term heat-wise.

The builders are back and seem to be digging a trench round the front of the house. Exciting times, especially when it comes to having to practically vault across said trench to get home. Fun.

I looked up some good info today about cyclones, tornadoes and hurricanes, what with all the drama and sadness in Burma/Myanmar. Here it is for you, courtesy of Yahoo Answers:

All areas of low pressure are cyclones. So technically a tornado and hurricane are both cyclones. The terms hurricane, typhoon and cyclone are all used to describe the same type of weather system. In the Atlantic and East Pacific they are hurricanes, in the West Pacific they are typhoons and in the Indian ocean and Australia they are called cyclones or more specifically tropical cyclones.

It is also true that some people in the midwest will call tornadoes cyclones, which they are.

I finished reading Inheritance of Loss. It's a sad book, but wonderfully written. I wish I could capture moments and create visions like Kiran Desai has - there are parts where you can't escape, that's how vivid it is. I felt the same kind of apprehension reading this book as I have only mostly felt with films/tv before, that's how into the story you can get. But, like I said, despite a little glimmer of positivity and hope at the end, really, there's too much turmoil and unsolved difficulties for me to be happy about it. Anyway, I am done with that and by chance in the library I found The Stone Diaries, which the guy in our photocopying room recommended to me. Given my recent criticisms of Pulitzer prize winners, I have decided to re-open my mind and give it a go. An easy place to start - this book was short-listed for a Booker as well, so I don't have to leap too far in my first few steps. I love the opening quote:

nothing she did
or said

was quite
what she meant

but still her life
could be called a monument

shaped in a slant
of available light

and set to the movement
of possible music

(From "The Grandmother Cycle" by Judith Downing, Converse Quarterly, Autumn)

More reading

Jonno, are you reading my blog?! This is the sure fire way to tell. Clearly rhetorical questions provide the best answers.

My family are all out until lunchtime (I'm back in Brampton) and so I thought I'd use this time to think of more dazzling things to say during my interview on Friday. Obviously that is going well - everything I say is dazzling. So I decided I didn't need to do that after all so instead I've been distracting myself. On the plus side, I did look up the interview location so hopefully I won't be late in attending (note to self: punctuality is in my own hands. Yes it is.)

Finished Perks, it had a happy ending I guess, but it came about through a looong and saaad way, boo. I think I should go back to reading kids books with my cousins, they are not as dramatic. Although when Dora the Explorer was about to figure out who had been making the footprints in the sand, my heart almost stopped beating. It was Benny, of course, wearing flippers. Duh.

Now I'm finally on to The Inheritance of Loss, and properly this time, and it's good. Puja, you'll be happy!

Rambley Update - mainly about books it seems

Phew. It's been a while since I posted. Things have been a bit hectic over here. In a good way.

Have been moving around the houses of all my cousins. Most of my time has been spent "playing," which, frankly, is awesome. Despite being almost 22 years older than my youngest cousin (who I've just managed to put to sleep) I get treated like one of the kids over here; this could explain why I like it so much. No need to think or worry about anything - we just play and eat and sleep and watch TV and its good fun. Lots of charades and Junior Monopoly and building blocks and all that kinda stuff, it's cool. With my older cousins we discuss stuff and argue and debate and that's cool too - it's great that they've grown up now, to actual people with opinions and ideas and knowledge.

Aside from all the family stuff (it was Tamil New Year on Sunday, so LOTS of family), I've been doing a lot of reading, and thinking too (essentially the work has been abandoned). I read a book called The One Minute Apology, which was useful. The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing was seriously thought-provoking, unusual, and weird too. I tried to not engage with it, but I couldn't help myself. It made me sad again, why can't people just be good and right to each other and themselves? After that I started Fifth Business but had to leave it at someone's house, so I will pick up a copy back home. But I did read Love Marriage, authored by a cousin on my dad's side, which really made me think. It's all about my family and Tamil society etc. so it's difficult to read it objectively, but it got good reviews from outsiders, and I really liked it. Like her, I feel lost in myself, in so many ways.

Over here you feel your Tamilness a lot stronger than in London, but then you also feel your lack of Tamilness too, even in simple things like cooking and colloquialisms, and just "how we do things back home" versus what I've been brought up with. The second generation here sometimes seem to know where they stand, but mostly they're lost too.

Now I'm halfway through The Perks of Being a Wallflower, which I love, but it's at another cousin's house.

Thinking wise, well, this is funny. All my aunts and uncles, whenever I ask them when they're next coming to visit, they say they'll be coming for my wedding. I was shocked, and then became quite prickly about it, so they only joke with me now and then, but really, I think they're gearing themselves up for a wedding. Sure I'll be 25 in September (marriage alert, marriage alert!) but what? I can't be getting married any time soon, I don't know what I'm doing in practically every aspect of my life, how on earth can I cater to someone else's? Hmm, this is unnerving, it's like a rock hanging just above my chest, and occasionally I feel it press down and it scares me. It's odd though, because my little cousin was reading her story book to me, and in it the main character spoke about "feeling like a weight had been removed from his shoulders", but my cousin said that the main character still wasn't happy, as even though the weight had been removed, the pain from the weight remained on his shoulders. Pretty deep for an 8-year-old.

Anyway, I'm heading back from Ajax to Brampton tomorrow so will try and give a less random update before I head back to London. Most excitingly, we're going to the Royal Ontario Museum, which sounds like it'll be full of random tat exhibits, woo hoo! A helpful distraction.

One day down

Inspection day 1. I escaped, hurrah!

Turns out planning and being prepared and creating exciting lessons and putting some effort in actually leads to better teaching. Who knew eh? If only I had the time to do this kinda work all year, well, my kids would surely benefit. This patently explains why I was such a better teacher last year - I just had more time to do it in.

Figured I will get seen tomorrow, am already a bit scared. One of the inspectors is a maths specialist, and I am the most junior in the department, and the only NQT, hence it's guaranteed. Really hope it's not with my Y10s. Also am teaching lessons 1 to 4 back-to-back, so it's a STRESS anyway. Hmm. Don't forget Y9 parents' evening tomorrow night too, and then it's Friday week A all over again, great!

What else? It's my mother's birthday today, we're having a dinner party, guests have just got here (or so it sounds) so will pop a look in, but then scramble off to bed, my throat is still sore.

Looked up some words from Atonement:

garrulous - full of chatter
equanimity - composure; steadiness of mind under stress
lariat - a cord tied as a necklace that ends like a necktie

Also love this bit from p90, it got to me:

"The anticipation and dread he felt at seeing her was also a kind of sensual pleasure, and surrounding it, like an embrace, was a general elation - it might hurt, it was horribly inconvenient, no good might come of it, but he had found out for himself what it was to be in love, and it thrilled him".

Bertie, high fives :)

Being a positive teacher

I had a bit of a dodgy night's sleep last night. Lots of hours and everything, but kept getting disrupted, grrr. Thus this morning I was cross and resolved to hand in my resignation first thing. I am prone to dramatic extremes.

Anyway, my crossness rapidly dissolved when I entered my classroom and found my lost blue earring on my table! One of the cleaners had discovered it in another room, which cheered me no end. So I resolved to be positive all day to repay the good karma.

My classes were all really ace - I forget how much fun school sometimes is, and also how much I enjoy it. Obviously soon this feeling will be weighed down by the marking and incident reports and bad behaviour and bureaucracy, but for now it's ok.

The best bits were in Y10, when one of the girls said she really liked maths this year because of me, and when another stayed back after the lesson to show me the extra work she'd done in the holidays. Also in Y9, when I told the kids they only had 15 mins left of the lesson, and they remarked that they had no idea where the time had gone, the lesson had passed by so quickly. I took this as a good sign - when time goes quickly for me it's cos I'm enjoying whatever I'm doing.

Y12 made me laugh too. We're beginning the topic on gender and educational achievement, discussing stereotypes and expectations for different genders. We had a lengthy and comical debate about what we were like as children, and whether it's ok for boys to cry. All five of the girls in my group are "girly girls" so I was surprised to hear that three had been tomboys. Similarly, one of the very laddish and comedy boys told me he'd played with his own Barbies as a kid, setting up families with his dolls and Power Rangers. Funny stuff.

Only my tutor group were tiring today. They just talk too much. My new island table layout doesn't help much since now there are even more people for each child to talk to. However, instead of complaining, I have decided to create an inter-table competition for the class, so that good behaviour is rewarded on an individual and table by table basis. I've made a lovely poster and hopefully the kids will respond to the league table style set-up, and behave better. On the poster making note, I also made a "star table" poster to put up in the window next to my "students of the week" poster. The idea here is that each week the best table out of all of my classes will be photographed and put up in the window for all to see. Obviously by best table I mean the best working kids on a table, not the table itself, that would be rubbish, they are all boring and identical.

I have 25 pages of Love in the Time of Cholera to read (it is getting seriously good, and sad, they are all old and about to finally accept their love) but realised today that my copy of The Reluctant Fundamentalist is due back this weekend, so may try and blitz that in the next 3 nights instead. Tactical.

The Amy Winehouse Stand-Ins

I read this article on The Times Online about who we could listen to while Amy has some time off. Since I have lots of time to check this stuff out, I played through the suggested stand-ins. Some were good, some were great.

In particular, when you have a spare minute, check out:

Adele - when you're feeling soulful (actually sounds a bit like Amy + sick piano and bass)
Ebony Bones - when you're feeling funky (her stuff is ridiculous, very similar to MIA)
Tawiah - when you're feeling deeeep London hood-soul (pretty raw here, it's nice)
Bridgette Amofah - when you wanna hear Jij (I swear this is Jij's alias, just an octave lower! And also her tagline is "Bit 'o' drama" excellent)

I love listening to songs with words that mean things.

Speaking of words, some that I have looked up recently...

erudite - knowledgeable
repudiate - deny
complicite - knowing about something that you should stop but fail to thus becoming part of it
pathos - a style or quality that invokes feelings (particularly sorrow or pity)
intransigent - stubborn
ephemeral - short-lived

These are from Love in the Time of Cholera, which I am already loving, despite only being on chapter 2. I also like the name Gabriel, I am adding it to the list.

Words from a book

In attempt to occupy my mind a little, I am now reading Too Beautiful for You by Rod Liddle. A funny collection of short stories about messed-up affairs in South London. I am only three stories in, but already I have had to look up lots and lots of words. Please understand, I am not thick, I could probably get the gist of maybe a third of these words, and could even loosely define them. But some I've never heard before. So here's a little test, how many can you define? Answers below.

1. insouciant
2. emollient
3. prussic
4. pyrolytic
5. rancour
6. contumely
7. bellicose
8. perspicacity
9. inchoate
10. diadem
11. expedient
12. iniquity
13. histrionics
14. astringency
15. imperturbably
16. ineluctable
17. indolent
18. supplication
19. opprobrium
20. irradiated

1. insouciant - casual
2. emollient - having a softening or soothing effect, especially with regards to the skin
3. prussic - hydrocyanic acid; hydrogen cyanide in water; so probably not a nice description of someone
4. pyrolytic - resulting from pyrolysis, which is the transformation of one substance into one or more substances by heat alone with oxidation
5. rancour - resentment
6. contumely - abuse; a rude expression intended to offend or hurt
7. bellicose - battleful; having or showing a ready disposition to fight
8. perspicacity - shrewdness
9. inchoate - in an initial or early stage; not fully developed
10. diadem - crown
11. expedient - serving to promote your interest
12. iniquity - absence of moral or spiritual values
13. histrionics - exaggerated dramatic behaviour designed to attract attention
14. astringency - from astringent: sharp and penetrating; pungent or severe
15. imperturbably - from imperturbable; not easily excited or upset; marked by extreme calm and composure
16. ineluctable - inescapable; irresistible
17. indolent - disinclined to work or exertion; so lazy then
18. supplication - invocation; a prayer asking for God's help as part of a religious service
19. opprobrium - disgrace arising from exceedingly shameful conduct
20. irradiated - treated with radiation

How'd you do? More words will come I am sure. Nice to see I'm keeping myself busy.

Robins

I was walking in the park today and I saw my first robin. Winter is here.

Some good things: I've been signed off for the rest of the week with "stress related difficulties" so no need to stress about that any more; my thyroxin levels are normal so I don't have a problem there; I finished The Amber Spyglass and it was just awesome. No better words to describe it, but I loved it, and can't wait for the films.

Things to contemplate: if it's not a thyroxin problem, then what is it?

School are being really good to me, telling me to take it easy and get better. This is the hardest part, I don't know how to get better. It's not like a broken leg or something. No, actually, it is, because it feels like I just have to wait it out. I feel a bit better really, so am going to be optimistic, despite feeling a bit like a fraud. Going back to school next week will be tough, people are look for the obvious and if they can't see anything wrong with me, they will think I'm messing about. I don't want their sympathy, but I'm not messing around. Will just have to grit my teeth and get on with it. And think of robins.

Reading and Writing

I finished my statement of purpose in the end. But I don't like it yet, it's not quite right.

Then I made a mistake. I started reading this and then I couldn't sleep, it was all a bit too real. Now I am out of bed and ready to plan lessons. But first I must write my own (poem, not lesson, although maybe they could be the same thing?) else I will be distracted all day.

I think I may have judged the Amber Spyglass too early, it's already very good and mysterious, please erase all my negative comments from your minds.

Update 10:49
Hohoho, it is complete, and I like it. It's a bit filthy though. You, please don't read too much into it, I am feeling a bit dramatic today.

The Perfect Bed

It used to be the case
That in the instant before I landed
The delicate closing of my eyes
Would open my mind up
Wide like a gracious host to sleepy dreams.

The perfect bed
In the corner by the window
Made it oh so easy.
Lumbering and confidently Victorian
In its dominance of the room.

Slipping in and under the ideal weight
Originally wrapped in tessellations of footballs
But now alternating mocha and beige
Just like us.
In the mornings I struggle to shed this second skin.

I wonder if the perfect bed
Would change in your presence?
My certainty is that it would sincerely succeed in
Warming you and cooling me
Until we were mathematically satisfied.

So I toss and turn and flip the pillow over
Hoping the fresh side will distract me
From lucid dreams of tongue tracing
Maple syrup ABCs along your spine.
Even though food isn’t allowed in the perfect bed.

The varnish fails to hide the mottles in the wood
Swirls that he used to graze with hot fingertips
Melting me.
Now it’s you that keeps me awake
Pondering whether your dearth is its first flaw.

Varnish; Squash; Books

My gosh the house stinks! All this varnish is making me really rather light-headed. Tried opening the windows, but frankly would choose being a wee bit high over freezing my ass off almost every time.

My Metro horoscope suggested that the Pisces Moon is making me unproductive. I am happy to use this excuse. Rest and relaxation is called for, it said, so I have decided to do just that. The guilt is nagging, but only quietly, I can block it out.

Played 4 games of squash with Ish last night, thoroughly enjoyed myself. I forget how much I like Ish until I see her again. She is one of those where you can jump straight back in to the level of intimacy you had before, as if we had never really been apart. The games were good, and the chatter was good too, but I am sad for her. She hates her job, and it's messing up her life. Such a shame, she has so much potential. For those of you that don't know her, she is perfectly vivacious, the life and soul of whatever's going on, the kind of person who can be everything to everyone. But yesterday she wasn't fully herself, and she blames her job. I hope she can get out. Actually, I just hope she can get back to being her old self.


In other news, I finished A Brown Man and Other Stories, and am now suitably paranoid about my coffee coated exterior (literally, I tipped the cafetiere too far, but like the smell, particularly as it is attempting to overthrow the varnish). I have moved on to The Amber Spyglass. Finally I hear you say Bladey. Well, yes, and no. I am about 6 pages in and already finding it tedious. I am sure I'll love the middle bit of the story, but I hate getting into it. It doesn't help that I went to the library after the gym this morning and now have 7 other books that I'd rather read. It's going to be a battle.

I may be out drinking tonight, so I apologise in advance if I'm on poor form tomorrow. Except I won't be because I'm so excited about seeing all you girls again, especially in such a swanky venue! Woohoo, it's gonna be lovely, can't wait to catch up!

Greece Baby!

I'm going to Greece tomorrow, yippee!
We're going here:

Lefkas (Levkas, Lefkada, Leucas) is a small Greek island off the north-western coast of the mainland. South of Corfu, north of Ithaca and Cephalonia, Lefkas isn't part of the Cyclades, but instead holds a proximate position to the Preveza Perfecture. As such, Levkas has recently seen a boost in tourism and travel to the area. However, it still remains largely unspoilt. And it's supposed to be wicked sailing out there! Am very excited :) So much so that I'm not too daunted by our crazy check-in time of 0440.

My excitement is only limited by the fact that my crazy Snack Acca is over here from New York with my uncle too. I love her, she's just so funny! Alas she's only here for a week and so I won't get to see her apart from today. Hopefully she'll be back soon to promote her amazing book, which is being released in the spring.


Ok, I don't know that it's actually amazing, but it's based to an extent on the trials and tribulations of my family, so obviously that'll make interesting reading for me! Plus I know all about the different types of marriage, particularly arranged vs love. Weird how those two things are mutually exclusive. Well, not weird, just kinda sad. Anyway, I hope it doesn't lead to some huge family fall-out type thing since we've had more than enough of those thank you very much. You can check the amazon preview here.

You know what though? I just checked the US amazon for her book and there it costs $11.16, but in the UK it costs £12.99! What a shocker, that's more than double the price, how can that be?!

In other news I have finally finished watching Grey's Anatomy seasons 1 & 2, and now am desperate to get hold of season 3. I am also contemplating starting Jade's West Wing collection, but this could be risky since I have to leave for dinner soon (well, in 4 hours, but that's soon in TV land).

Enjoy the last week of the summer holidays, fingers crossed for sunshine!

Q-U-A-L-I-F-I-E-D-!!!!

Swap driver for teacher. Woohoo! Not a fraud any more, no more pretending, it's true, I am a real proper qualified teacher :)

Strange, I don't look any different. Maybe I will have to get a QTS tattoo across my forehead to prove it.

Canters was ace, so much fun, I am back in love with the whole TF experience. Will tell the tales really soon, but right now am knackered and have to prepare for business school tomorrow.

Holidays schmolidays, I am clocking hours like it was a school day. At least I get to drink though!

Still not finished Harry Potter, but nearly....

Miss P QTS, sounds good eh?